The man’s guide to women
Women are perhaps from a planet called Backwards. They speak a different language, do the opposite of you and sometimes just react in a way that makes no sense at all.
Esquire gives a few tips for how to react in these otherworldly situations.
She’s giving you the silent treatment: Say, “I love you and smile innocently.”
Where’s dinner? “You know what would be so great? That amazing pasta dish that you made a couple of weeks ago.”
She’s yelling. Find out at whom she’s yelling. If it’s someone else, let her yell. If it’s you, say, “Let’s have a drink and talk about it.”
Her chin is quivering. Immediate hug. Be prepared for tears.
She’s still getting ready. Remember that she just wants to look her best.
She won’t have sex with you. Give her a back rub, kiss her neck.
Her friend is extremely attractive. Avoid direct eye contact.
She won’t return your phone calls. Move on.